Even though I do appreciate someone's persistence, I have found that whenever I tried to be gracious and sent something like "Thanks for your interest," and end it with, "Good luck with your search," guys always take that as she replied, and now I have my foot in the door. Guys are idiots, and that's why I've always used the rule, "No answer, is your answer."
Simple. Easy to remember...so what was I thinking when I replied to this one guy, Dave?! And, this my friends, is what you get when you try to be nice:
Dave:
I really do appreciate your interest, but I do have personal requirements - as I'm sure you do, too. Let me remind you that I'm 5'11", which would make us the same height. I'm really looking for someone who is taller than me.
Please, *laughing* don't you even DARE say that I'm missing out on some great guys (including yourself) because I've heard it all before....that I'm "limiting" myself. However, I won't date a guy who is less than 6'1" for the same reason you guys won't date an over-weight girl, because no matter how nice, sweet, good-looking she is, you won't date her because of a physical attribute.
But again, thank you for your interest. :)
Carrie
DAVID1029
8:13pmOMG! WOW! I am OK with all you have to deal with. I feel bad for you. I really did'nt realize you were an AMAZON :-) The poor guy that gets you needs to worry about more than being 6'1" LMAO! I mean it to I am laughing my ass off :-)
Clearly, I wasn't going to reply to this rude freak.
DAVID1029
8:20pm
The comical thing about your response is you equate a mans height with a fat woman. I mean think about how psychotic that is. DA, you wouldnt date a fat woman nor would I date a 5' 11" man. You are one of my all time favorite idiots I've ever met on match. I mean it honey I am laughing so f-ing hard right now. Thank you, this was f-ing priceless :-) That poor bastard that gets hooked by you.
And I wasn't going to reply to that email either, but he just couldn't let it go!
DAVID1029
8:23pm
The self consumtion you must have to endure must be tough. As nuts as your statement is about the thought of a man trying to talk you into dating him after your response is laughable.You really a re a bit to self consumed honey. Thank you again for the laugh. I am passing this one around to my buds.
And so, there you have it! Lesson learned in the wonderful world of Match.com:
NO ANSWER, IS YOUR ANSWER!
Oh this is just the best. Can't believe we have no comments here yet. Here are my thoughts from another on and off professional online dater-our red headed writer is correct, no answer is your answer. Why do guys get so sensitive to this? I have plenty of no responses as well when I reach out to someone so it is a total 2 way street. And if I am not interested, then there are too many freaks out there and I don't have the time to have someone who does not know me in the least, take out their bullshit on me like Dave did above. Why do we have to feel obligated to respond to anyone that we have never even met? I don't. I am an adult, not a bitch, just an adult and you have to be careful what you put out there on these sights. The most polite not interested can turn into a bunch of crap you don't need or deserve.
ReplyDeleteI'd have to say that by the responses from Dave, he is the one who is self-consumed. Being a guy, I know most guys feel that any response is an open door, correctly described by the Red Headed Writer. It's all about them, in a lot of cases, and they probably assume any woman in a dating site is, well... A sad truth of how the testosterone-based little mind works.
ReplyDeleteThat sad part is that guys like this ruin it for the rest of us nice guys that can handle a polite "Thanks but no thanks." by simply saying "Thanks for your reply, and good luck in your own search!"
ReplyDeleteYou know one of his buddies was drooling at the bit to get your name, how many times are men looking for a confident woman that knows exactly what she is looking for. Men hold a vision of what they want and our red head deserves the same.
ReplyDeleteBravo Red Head!